Day 38 Wicked Wednesday..."avoid the near occasion of sin."

April 7, Day 38 of Challenge. Ran 3 miles/ Total so far: 72.4/ Miles to go: 927.6
Weekly Grand/Lotto - did not win lotto...won $4 on Weekly Grand...Total Investment so far $12, winnings $8 Net: down $4

Wednesdays are the days of the temptress at work. I arrive to the smell of donuts and warm sausage kolachis strategically placed in the faculty/staff coffee room so that I have to both see and smell them everything I get a cup of coffee or brew some hot tea or refill my water glass. There are all kinds of donuts, but my favorite are the fried cake donuts crusted with sugary icing. I am sure they have more calories than two of the others combined and I know that if I eat one that the few minutes of blissful sugar high will soon be replaced by the sugar withdrawal low which can often prompt a repeat performance since whoever buys the donuts, etc. (which also includes all kinds of bagels with endless tubs of flavored cream cheese) buys enough for two days worth, resulting in the leftovers from the morning frenzies remaining in boxes begging to be taken throughout the day like sad puppies in pet shop windows.

As I moved through the crowd of morning feasters to get my first cup of coffee (having run out at home and not being at all satisfied by the Tetley's tea substitute) I remarked to the assemblage that they reminded me of a flock of pigeons who had just alighted when a homeless bag lady started spreading bread crumbs. Everyone looked at me with that "What are you talking about?" look that I often get when I trip out in my stream of consciousness thinking that gets orally expressed....then they smiled a knowing smile and parted like the Red Sea just enough so that I could pass to the coffee maker. I tried to not look at any of the goodies. I have the most will power in the mornings and this morning I smugly left the food alone, content that I could overcome that desire, one donut at a time.

Of course, like the siren's call, all day the leftovers whispered my name. I had eaten a healthy breakfast at home of oatmeal with blueberries, a banana, a handful of pecans flavored with some Cinnamon but by 10:30 I was hungry so I passed by the donuts and got a yogurt out of the refrigerator in the staff lounge, Activia....more healthy fare. I keep a week's supply so I can eat one in the mid-morning. I also keep a jar of almonds on my desk for an afternoon snack (supposed to lower cholesterol) but in my haste to leave this morning I left the new bag of almonds and some apples (I keep them on my desk also for afternoon munchies...apple a day keeps the doctor away, right?) on the kitchen counter. But I did succeed in avoiding the temptation of the donuts this morning.

Lunch found me at the Belo....the Dallas Bar Association conference center located in an old mansion downtown that has been greatly expanded. It is call the Belo because that is the name of the family that once lived there (owners of the Dallas Morning News). There was an Ethics Committee lunch meeting which I needed to attend, both because I am the Vice Chair (love that word...vice) and to get one hour of MCLE credit to keep my law license (Mandatory Continuing Legal Education). The buffet good at the Belo is good and once again I exercised my will power to avoid the desserts and stick to some grilled chicken, veggies and a spoonful of herbed wild rice.
Educated and satiated I returned to my office about 1:30 for the rest of the hectic day.

As the afternoon wore on my hunger set in. No almonds, no apple and in a room away cake donuts calling out my name. I had (and I know this will sound weird because it is to me too) a can of sardines in a cupboard of my office left over from one of my Atkins diets when I ate only protein and veggies and was looking for some variety...no carbs in sardines. At 4:00 p.m. I succumbed and ate the sardines, out of the tin. I can't say they tasted great, but edible they were. And I had once again dodged the donut bullet.

I had a Student Bar Association Voting Council meeting at 5:00. As Dean of Students I am the advisor. They always have food. I wanted to abstain because it is usually not the healthiest and often there is not enough for everyone. Unfortunately today the meeting was not that well attended and there were mountains of waffle fries and Chick Fil-a fried, breaded chicken strips left over when all the students had eaten their fill. So like the Apostles gathering the crumbs from the leftovers after the miracle of the loaves and the fishes and the feeding of 5,000, I found myself loading up a plate of chicken strips and waffle fries...dinner before my 7:20 class. And they tasted GOOD!

After class, tired from a day that began at 6:30 a.m. I wanted to go home, but instead went to the gym and for variety, ran 3 miles on the indoor track which is 19 and a half laps. Basketball and indoor soccer games were in play below and I could follow each as I circumnavigated the gym. I felt good after the run and got home about 10:15. Here is where I made my fatal mistake. I should have just gone to bed but I decided that one glass of Cabernet would allow me to unwind and relax. It did. But it also made me hungry again and the bag of potato chips left over from Easter company (crispy Kettle chips) was too much for my wine weakened will power. After salty chips I always want something sweet and so the last piece of Mrs. Savages coffee cake also disappeared.

So the good news was that I avoided the donuts but the bad news was that I ate the chips, cake and chick fil'a. Of course the other good news was that I did run. All these struggles reminded me of the Catholic prayer called "An Act of Contrition" which you say before and after going to confession. There is a line in there about being sorry for your sins and promising not to sin again (which is always broken...at least in my life) and also agreeing to "avoid the near occasion of sin." As a child I used to think this was just too much. Not only could I not sin, I could not even get near it....impossible. As an adult and looking back on today I understand more the wisdom of that line. If there had been no chips or coffee cake in the house, I probably would not have gotten in my car at 11 to go to the store and I would have enjoyed my wine and gone to bed. A lesson to be learned in what to keep and not keep in my house.....But in any event, Life is Good!